Mr. A was disappointed. A social problem was happening in their country, and he was feeling distressed, disappointed, and confused.
The story must be something familiar to many of us. These days, we see many countries facing political, economic, social, or psychological problems. There is injustice, war, anxiety, a feeling of uselessness, and a lack of agency.
Why do psychologists tell us to find meaning in our crowded and disappointed lives? And how does it work?
I sometimes think of why there is injustice in the world politically and philosophically. Or why there is social, racial, gender, and workplace discrimination in different contexts.
But how do you see thinking constantly about these issues and just dysregulating our emotions? Let’s think of some good ways to regulate our emotions in addition to doing something effective. I think “meaning” is something crucial that we can cling to in our struggles and hardships.
- Micro-meanings that can be Macro ones
I have a little ring with a design of “The Little Prince” on it. It is a kind of micro meaning that when I feel distressed, I wear it and feel like one day, the world will be as exquisite as in “The Little Prince” story. Spirituality is another reliable aspect in the lives of human beings. Micro-meaning can be anything from praying to meditation or just a peaceful drinking of a cup of tea/coffee.
- Focus on “Circle of Influence.”
Maybe you feel powerless and can not change a political/social/economic issue. But better to focus on the circle of influence. It means you want the world to be more just. Here, you can start small on your part and act justly with your family, coworkers, employees, etc. If you want the world to be more kind, start with a circle you can affect and help people as much as you can. This mindset gives you agency and hopefulness. It doesn’t mean to stop acting socially; it means to do your part and trust in God.
- Change your agony and suffering into a “Narrative Identity.”
In psychotherapy, there is an approach called Reminiscence Therapy. In this approach, they work on how to put your life’s events into a “Narrative Identity”. And so whenever you feel distressed or in a kind of crisis, put into words and try to understand what this suffering teaches you. How has this experience transformed me into a more insightful person? In this approach, we try to change our suffering into meaning. And here the release happens.
For example, I had a time in life feeling lonely. I tried to change this into meaning. After that period of my life, I felt that I was wiser in choosing new friends, and I understood loneliness helped me to grow deeper and further than others of a similar age. In many periods of life, this could happen to us. And you can transform your pain into meaning.
In conclusion, every human being experiences difficulties and discrimination. The thing that makes us different, radiant, and outstanding is your capacity to make life meaningful and rely on your values and meanings. I would be happy to hear your comments about your experiences and how you turned them into meaning. And tell me about your circle of influence! I’m so eager to hear from you.
To Think ... 